Don't Wake Me.... I'm Dreamin-in...

Ok, so have you ever been in a situation where you are in a dating quagmire? I mean you're not getting what you want, you're not sure you could get what you wanted if you worked harder, plus you don't really feel like working harder anyway. What to do, what to do?

Well when you find yourself in this position, do absolutely nothing... This is called the fall asleep game. Fall asleep... It just like that old stereotype... Take a nap and everything will work itself out by the morning... Now to be clear I do not mean to insinuate that clarity will expose itself in one nights time, but leave it alone, it will all work out.

Example, you're out on a date with one of these really fine professional "post-feminist" types. This pretty much means their ideas on gender equality are fairly hypocritical and generally prone to be antagonistic to you in the beginning. She is much more likely to be an ass even if you pay for everything and are a perfect gentleman because she wants you to know that as an educated black man you really ain't all of that. You go on a date or two, you chat a few times, its cool, but she has the guards up and you can see she is gearing up for a lot of that bullshit. What do you do? Nothing... Not a damn thing, don't be rude but don't feel the need to do anything pro-active. Go on other dates... Basically forget her, it will really be fine. See for the next two weeks when you haven't called she may send you a coy text or something trying to draw you into a conversation where she wants you to ask her out. Don't fall for the bait, how do you answer a "hello" text? "Hi" how do you answer a "How are you?" text, with the ever popular "cool... busy" and walk away... You have answered one text, so you are not bitching at them but if they write back you don't have to answer the others... in fact you don't answer the first text for a few hours anyway so you're not a dick, and you are doing your own thing. In the meantime while they are living their own life they start to go through the math themselves... This is a good dude, he is educated, treated me nice on a date, I was on that bullshit, and now I am not sure if he is really being distant on purpose or if he really is just busy. Since he was nice before I will give him the benefit of the doubt... or not. And here is the great part of the game, instead of paying for more dates and wasting time, the person who is more adaptable to your current goals will self select themselves as the person who calls you back and who doesn't... and when they call you back they have already made the decision to be less of an ass with you so generally they are acting right. And the greatest part of all of this is that you are generally unaware of all the complicated machinations that have gone on because generally you were asleep. You only know it worked when you get the call that seems random out of the blue by that girl you almost forgot about except this time she seems so much nicer now. It's the greatest.

The fall asleep game doesn't just work on women, it is perfectly applicable to men. the internal machinations are different but what the hell do you care because when you wake up the shit is working out right. And it works for whatever your goal is... this is not just about getting a relationship, or getting ass, it is just a fairly effective training tool. The basic premises is that most people spend too much time being game theorists and trying to think everything out. Usually, if they are just chill its not so high stress and the fall asleep game is not necessary. But if they are always trying to work an angle, ignore their ass and let them either get in or get out. See its great, you want a low key dinner partner, just only answer them if there is a request for dinner, they will figure it out if they can handle it. You want them to stop fronting... It comes through if they are the type that can do it.

I know, I know, you don't believe it can be that easy. Converts to the fall asleep game only come through experience. But realize when you are too worried about what some person is thinking and what they are doing next the fall asleep game may be happening on you.

Bit of warning, the fall asleep game does not make you impervious to other game, its like rock paper scissors, it can beat some game, and it gets beat by some other, but more times than not the fall asleep has served me well and as a good friend I figured I'd share.

Au Revoir...