is why? Why is the question that makes us act like ass holes or causes most of the fear, and gets us involved in most of the bullshit that we are in. See why is the question that changes the point from mere honesty to unneccesary cruelness and at a certain point, in most circumstances it is the most unnecessary question to ask.
Its funny because as a lawyer the why is the question that most people are reticent to ask, and that is where it is most important. It is impossible to trully answer if you are in violation of this law or principle if we can not determine why you did what you did. However the time when it is most asked is in relationships when the answer holds no bearing at all on your current or future circumstance. It's like what could a person possible say to why they don't want to be with you that would make you feel any better? What could they say that would mitigate the pain? Not a damn thing, and unfortunately the truth is likely merely cruel for cruelties sake.
The answer to why can be shallow, or it can be substantive, but at a certain point the decision has been made so it is not really changeable. And to me there is nothing sadder than we you see someone trying to debate another person into the merits of starting or maintaining a relationship with them. Instead we get people who act out because of the fear of the why. They don't want to say that they don't find you attractive, or interesting anymore, so they pick petty fights or dodge the issue to make you want to leave so that they don't have to tell you something that they think is mean. Hell sometimes they don't know, but its the awkward conversation of not knowing why you want to be gone but being certain that you need to be away that is the true pain in the ass. And I know we should owe you better, or you should owe us better, but there is no good way around the why.
It's like a friend of mine once told me, you should never give an excuse for anything, because that makes it sound like "I would, but..." and honestly how many times is that the situation. Usually the answer is No, and no more explanantion is necessary than I don't want to, of course you have to be fairly honest with yourself to make sure that the excuses you are feeding to others are not the excuses you are feeding to yourself as well. Nonetheless, this is not the type of behavior that will win you sensitivity awards, and no one wants to be hated, so we try our best to avoid the why, but even when people don't ask sometimes you WANT to tell them... sometimes out of spite, and sometimes because you hope than can correct themselves... with someone else, but nonetheless correct themselves... See being an asshole is easier, people don't expect much so u can't lose because no-one asks the asshole Why? they just assume the worse and slightly contempt u for it, though assumed slight do tend to sting less than explicit ones...
No comments:
Post a Comment